The building blocks of creating your future when you’re just getting started in life can certainly be filled with excitement: dreaming your plan, soliciting advice and guidance while streamlining your direction, and then implementing it and putting forth all the hard work to bring your master plan to life. It’s natural that our focus remains on accomplishing and succeeding on our quest, instead of on the obstacles that might alter our course along the way. But there are many unknowns that lie ahead.

I was recently teaching a class of pilots at work and listening to one of my students tell me the story of how his dream of becoming an airline pilot was altered. He told me of all the years of commitment that he invested in flying and building hours of experience, but then the economic downturn in 2008 altered his intent. He needed to shift his focus from being a professional airline pilot to a job in the financial sector so he could support his family. Eleven years passed before he could try once again to reestablish that original goal. He succeeded due to his determination, and he finally made it to his first airline pilot job here where we work today. This story gets better: he is now sitting in the captain upgrade class I am teaching and moving further forward into his original career goals—all because he never gave up.

I told him there was a lot to be said for second chances: they’re rare and if that opportunity presents itself, there’s a reason it’s poised in front of you. The task at hand now is to focus on your goals. Weighing what family and friends have to say is always important, but remember, you inevitably want your dreams to become a reality. Be cautious of conjecture and hearsay because they are just opinions, not course corrections. How can others write your story or predict your fate when they are not you? Resilience, fortitude, courage, wisdom, inspiration, positivity, and spirit are all words to strive toward and wrap your future around as each day brings you closer to your dreams. Sew it into your soul as you walk your path and when the time is appropriate, chronicle your journey.

After he told me his story, I told him my own—how a surgery to save my life ended in causing a spinal cord stroke and paralysis from my neck down. Yes, I was physically shut down, but despite being told I would more than likely never walk again, I chose a different path by determining my own future. I set forth during my devastating trauma to dream and set all kinds of outrageous goals from traveling the world again to walking on a beach I grew up on. I wanted to write my own new future and open my mind to what could possibly be if I adopted a new way of thinking. After all, nothing changes unless we create the change.

Steps to Creating the Future You Want:

1) Dream about your future

• Progress begins with small wins.

• Small wins create confidence and help set your mind in motion toward making future goals.

• Goals are met through repetition. Setbacks will occur along the way, it’s inevitable. Therefore, create your own go-to place that helps to restore your confidence and gets you back on track. That could be a special place in your mind, a place that brings you happiness, or someone special in your life.

2) Ask for assistance

• Asking for help or assistance is important when it comes to letting others in because it knocks the rust off being socially active. It’s easy after trauma to become withdrawn; it comes with the territory. As a result, you’ve got to work harder to overcome this difficulty.

• Dreaming of your future and putting those goals in motion is a big leap after a trauma, but who do you intend to share your adventures with after all your accomplishments? Sharing your story is a gift from you to others, and inspires them along their own journeys.

• Sharing your goals with others may also lead to new or even better objectives when more than one person is involved. Part of the fun in actually doing the adventure is sharing all of its details later.

3) Work to make it happen/Make your dreams a reality 

• There are always decisions to be made and paths to be chosen when chasing your dreams and goals, but sometimes you just need to put them away and go do something random and obscure. No planning. Just follow your heart someplace and try not to critique; give yourself grace and absorb your surroundings.

• Embody something better within yourself and be a force that isn’t held to comparison. In other words, make the reality of your dream your own and let it blossom however it’s intended. If it evolves a little differently than planned, well, then just let it be and find grace and mindfulness at the moment because your efforts brought you to something new to appreciate.

• John Lennon and Bunny Wailer both wrote songs about living on borrowed time. We all only get to live our lives once, and it’s important that we find happiness on that journey. So, find your will, clear your mind, and take that leap of faith into making your dreams your reality.