Why should you choose to keep living?
There are so many ways for me to discuss the answer to this question. The first and easiest response is yes, absolutely, without any doubt, you should keep living and fight for your life every single second of every day. In the beginning you may be consumed by the shock and devastation of your trauma. Your brain is grappling with who you were before the event and will you be that person again after you heal. Each person’s circumstances are different and our ways forward may not be the same, but they are pointed in the same direction: ahead of us. There are many things to think about as you contemplate your initial steps and believe me, each step is worth your time.
Maybe that’s my answer to the question: You should choose to keep living because your life is WORTH living.
Now let’s talk about how we get ourselves oriented. As your mind wanders in the beginning while you battle your pain, try not to compare what you’re going through with others. It’s easy to find yourself saying what you’re going through is worse than someone else and therefore my situation is hopeless. Comparison gets you nowhere good fast.
But your situation isn’t hopeless. It’s just different. And you’re only in a competition with one person: You!
Let’s approach what you’re going through from another point of view. Our lives before a trauma or catastrophic event are usually full of activities that give us purpose, a routine, something we look forward to doing each day. As a result, we feel that we have self-worth and we offer value to our jobs, our family, and our friends.
However, all that disappears in a flash after something life-altering and life-threatening occurs. Suddenly we feel meaningless because it seems there’s nothing for us left to offer. Our confidence is shaken, and we’ve been caught off-guard with no direction or knowing what to do. Where do we even begin to pick up all the pieces and how do we put everything back together again?
My answer is threefold:
Clear your mind of what you can’t control
Focus on short-term goals and achievable wins
Surround yourself with a supportive community
In my case, I realized that I needed to concentrate on what I could control and focus on short-term goals and small wins to put me in a better frame of mind. I wasn’t interested in anything my doctors had to say because they weren’t living my experience. Because I chose this path, I also wasn’t interested in their prognoses. Have they ever been paralyzed? Have they ever had to learn to walk again? However, along with these thoughts I also wasn’t going to shut the rest of the world out of my life. I needed people around me because they helped to get my mind off my current situation.
During my initial days after a life saving surgery that left me immobile, I found myself trying to inspire and motivate the person in the bed next to me who lost a leg below the knee and had given up on his therapy and his life. I would speak to him day and night from a motionless body of all he had the potential of accomplishing and all he needed to get there was confidence, determination, and an imagination to take him toward a new life. In helping him I was recapturing my own purpose, a routine, and something to look forward to each day.
These were my own small goals and small wins, a selfless act that had the ability to build into something better. You have those abilities too. It’s just a simple choice, and I encourage you try.
My new life once again had meaning and something to offer from nothing more than a brain I could think with, a mouth I could speak from, ears I could hear with, and eyes that could see better days ahead. Isn’t determination beautiful? Yes, I could have given up too at any point in my years of recovery and I’m certainly not out of the woods yet, but I will always choose life and the many mysteries that lie ahead.
Life is always full of change and challenges that catch us off guard when we least expect them. Having an open mind and a willingness to accept change helps us to realize we can make new choices, set new goals, and move on with our lives.
Try to bring some sort of optimism into your life each day. Find your purpose and be creative. Do your best each day to find kindness and gratitude within you and share it often with others. Be appreciative of those in your orbit and beyond. When you’re kind to others, what you receive in return is better than any prescription medicine. Kindness toward others also rejuvenates your confidence, defines who you are as a human being, and uplifts, motivates, and inspires all around you.
If you need someone to talk to, hear your story, or offer help in some way, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me either in the comments below or through one of my social media accounts linked below.
Fight for your life, and know it’s always worth living.